Coffee and the Urban Dictionary

Every phase of motherhood brings its challenges and joys.  Every. single. phase.
My oldest child is entering high school next year and I feel like I am putting on hiking boots and stepping into unknown territory; or maybe putting on my fireproof suit and grabbing my flame thrower.  Potatoes, pototoes.

8th grade graduation breakfast

We celebrated our last day of school in style.  I was an emotional kangaroo bouncing from elation to tears.  Elation that summer break has arrived; tears because it was the last day I will ever homeschool my oldest child.  Sigh.  Where is the chocolate?  I need some pronto.

Last day of school 2013

Since my child will be going from homeschool to the second largest public high school in our county, I may be freaking out a bit.  Yes, I know she can handle it.  I know she's well rounded and will do great.  BUT.  But it is the idea of throwing my lamb in with the wolves that has me undone.  The problem is that I remember high school well.  I remember the lewd comments from not-so-gentlemanly boys.  I remember thinking that my parents didn't even know what french kissing was.  I remember too much.

And yet, here I am.  The MOTHER of a HIGHSCHOOLER!!!  I think that should be a cuss word.  Take that, you mother of a highschooler!  How did I get here?  I thought I was just getting the hang of the wonder years and preteen years.  Heck, didn't I just get married?

I am facing a year of letting go.  For goodness sakes, I had to let go of my youth this year when I "turned old."  The fact that I am slowly stepping out of the mommy spotlight for my daughters hit like a ton of bricks this week.
Brick #1: I was asked to go to their youth camp on the Mom Squad.  Their looks of horror and disdain was my first indication that our relationship might be changing.  I guess my coolness is no longer appreciated.  
Brick #2: I took my daughter and a friend to the mall this week... on a Saturday night. (enough said, right?)  I was wise enough to give them space and not be all up in their business but close enough to give the "mom look" to some googly eyed boys with their pants hanging down past their plaid boxers.  But then it hit me.  I'm the mom and they are the teen shoppers.  Shouldn't I be pushing a stroller and drooling over the Baby Gap window?  Why was that such a hard pill to swallow??

Sweet girls with their candle scent of choice.  Mine chose the one that smelled like a cute boy.  Sigh.

Brick 3: While at said mall, the cute twenty-something girl that served our Starbucks was a former student of mine.  Yes.  I taught her 4th grade the year I was pregnant with my soon-to-be high schooler.  Where's my cane?

So I did what every other normal freaking-out-mother would do.  I called my bestie for drinks.  We're wild: coffee for me and tea for her.
She just completed her first year as a M of a H.S. so she's totally in the know.   As I pelted her with questions I drooled over her breakfast choice.

After a 2 hour caffeine injection she brought me back around to reality.  Reminding me that it's going to be hard, but we're going to make it.  And that we'll grow old together.  Um, I think we've already hit that milestone.  

Anyhoo, I looked at her in all seriousness and said, "I have an important question for you."  She was expecting a deep, spiritual question but this is what she got:
"What does S.W.A.G mean?"
The only swag I know about is the free stuff Meg's sponsors give away on craft weekends.  I got a clue that it had a hidden meaning when I noticed it screen printed on a shirt in an urban themed store at the mall.
After she recovered from laughing, she realized I was dead serious.
I need to be in the know.  I need to know what the cool phrases are if I want to have intelligent conversations with my daughter, come August.
So my M of a HS friend whipped out her iphone and said, "there's an app for that."  We pulled up SWAG on the Urban Dictionary.  Yes, totally rockin our M of HS coolness at the coffee house.
Apparently there are many definitions of SWAG, but "free stuff from craft weekend" didn't make it to the Urban Dictionary.  There were some ugly words and ridiculous slang terms, but overall we learned that SWAG really means "appearance, style, or the way he or she presents them selves."  My favorite definition was "Something We All Get tired of hearing."
Let me be very clear.  I do not recommend the Urban Dictionary.  It is filled with nastiness and profanity.  Over our coffee, my friend and I decided it would not be an app to download, but we at least answered the question of the day.