May 7, 2012

When It Rains, It Pours

 To say it has been a challenging 5 days would be an understatement.

Last Thursday and Friday my kids had their end of grade testing.  As a homeschool mom, I think this is the most nerve racking time of the year.  After all, it is really a test to see if I did my job.  The kids did great, but it was still an anxious 2 days.
In the midst of that, we were preparing for our first official party at the new farm.  We worked our tails off sprucing things up and getting ready for 70 people to arrive on Saturday.  On top of those two stressors, we had 3 showings.  Um.  Yeah.  The week we went to the mountains I left my house pristine, awaiting showings.  Not. a single one.  Some kind of crazy.

Since this was a family event, we wanted to have fun stuff available for all ages.  Corn hole, whiffle ball, and fishing to name a few.  My sweet man even planned a hayride for the kids (of all ages). 

The weatherman was calling for 90+ degrees that day, so we modified a Pinterest idea:
 The party start time was 4pm.  Up until 3:50pm the sun was shining.  At 3:51 the clouds rolled in like angry fists ready for a fight.

They won.

 We watched our friends pull into the driveway and then drive away.  With each leaving car, my heart broke a little more.  All that planning.  All that hard work.  All of those hot dog buns sitting in the back of my car!  Four families stayed and made the most of it.  Somehow we squeezed under two tents to eat (standing up).  The kids thought jumping on the trampoline in the rain was awesome, so it wasn't a total loss.

By the time we pulled into our garage (soaking wet) and unloaded all the party stuff we had hauled out to the farm, my emotions were shot.

To be completely honest, I really didn't want to go to church on Sunday.  I was still an emotional train wreck.  I made it through most of the service but couldn't seem to get a grip during Sunday school.  At first I was totally embarrassed, but then I remembered that Christians often try to wear the mask of "everything's fine with me."   I gave up trying to fake it.  I was emotionally and physically worn out.

Sunday evening my husband suggested that I go pick up Chinese takeout for the family.  He knows I need some alone time.  I decided to stop at a cupcake store to drown my sorrows for a treat and as I approached the door the owner stepped out and said, "we're sold out."
Of course you are.

As today dawned I decided it had to get better.
I was wrong.
One of my daughter's ducks died during the night.
She and I cried together.
Out of 10 ducklings, she is down to one thanks to a nasty-mean-awful muskrat that thinks he owns our pond.  We've moved the lone duck back to our house and she's sharing the pen with our chickens.
To get my daughter's mind off the ducks, we took a morning field trip to get a bagel and visit the library.  On the way home we got a call.
We have another showing tonight.
Looks like I'll be loading the party cups/napkins/tablecloths/candles etc...  back into my car and we'll be eating hot dog buns for dinner.


the bennetts said...

i just wanted to hug you yesterday, instead of walking by during worship... i could tell you were worn. plumb. out.

my heart is heavy for you- i'm praying for you, sweet friend. thank you for being so transparent and sharing your struggles.

Bugs and Sunshine said...

you sweet thing, that is such a bummer. i'm so sorry it rained on your party. that is not nice!

your farm party sounded so cute and fun. the little station was adorable. i bet there will be many more farm night parties to be had not that that matters right now when you have hot dogs coming out your ears and have a heartbroken daughter. but one day, right?!

i'll say a little prayer tonight that tomorrow is filled with sunshine, unicorns and a sold house-lol!

Tracey said...

I know God has something big for you...I don't know what and I don't know when, but He does.


KR said...

Oh my goodness. I am so, so sorry. I never even made it down the hill to thank you. My little one was in the car sobbing at the weather. She was afraid for her life, while my big one was IN the pond. We actually came home early from a field trip/beach weekend for the party! Your farm just took my breath away--you couldn't have a more peaceful setting! I was expecting a field in the middle of nowhere. I have no idea why all this would dump on you like this but God is clearly up to something. I'm just sorry that it hurts. THANK YOU all for that warm welcome and all that you did, and especially for letting down your guard and being real. You're normal, and you are loved. Much.

Katie said...

Oh you poor thing, I don't like weeks like that but have had my fair share. It will get better :)

The Corbett Family said...

Oh Gretchen I wish I can hug you, tell you to blink and everything will be brighter than ever and since I can't I know your faith is strong, which will help you persevere through all of this. As soon as I read this post, I didn't know how to encourage so I closed my computer and hopped in the car and K-love was playing the song "He said" by Group 1 Crew. A great song that sounded exactly what I needed to pass on to you. You may already know it by heart. Some of the lyrics are below but it's better to hear on Youtube. Praying!

"So your life feels like it don’t make sense
And you think to yourself, “I’m a good person
So why do these things keep happening
Why you gotta deal with them
You may be knowcked down now
But don’t forget what he said
What he said
He said

“I won’t give you more
More than you can take in
I might let you bend
But I won’t let you break
You know oh
I’ll never ever let you go”
Don’t you forget what He said
Don’t forget what He said
He said

Who you are and what you’re going throughn (yeah)
So don’t let it get the best of you
Cuz God knows everything you need
So you ain’t gotta worry
You may be knocked down now
But just believe what He said
He said"

Mom said...

Your thoughtfulness in sharing the surplus was greatly appreciated yesterday by the troops...they ate every hotdog & brat (I cooked them on the grill before going in, so they even had that good grill taste)! We even ran out before they had their fill, so we had to finish filling them up with pasta.

Anonymous said...

Hugs, hugs and more hugs!!!

Jennifer, NC

Lori said...

Thank you for doing so much for the party Gretchen! We were really looking forward to it and hope you guys will do it again! I love your honesty and humor in your writing. Hopefully, your house will sell soon and you can have that stress behind you. God is big and nothing is a surprise to him. Stay focused on him and the rest will fall into place. Hugs!

truth in weakness said...

oh gretchen, i am so sorry. for all of it. but you know, Jesus sure shines so beautifully through you, friend. yes, even in your disappointment, His light radiates through you. and i'm so grateful for it.

last fall, as i began to put some of my own disappointments into words, a friend shared something w/ me in a comment that was so powerful. she said that when we go to God w/ all of the broken pieces of our hearts & cry out to Him, that it's okay "to even beat upon His chest in my hurt because He is big enough to take it and that at least there as I beat upon His chest, I would be in the circle of His arms so that He could comfort me in my loss."

i love you, friend. and i sure do love Jesus IN you. may His healing touch smooth the rough places in your journey.

hugs to you, sweet friend,

Richella said...

Oh, Gretchen. That old saying really does seem to be true--when it rains, it pours. Literally and figuratively, huh?

I'm so sorry about your party. Somehow it just hurts when you've gone to a lot of trouble and then all your plans come to naught, doesn't it? And then bam-bam-bam. . . to have all those other difficulties. . . Ugh.

I'm so sorry about your daughter's ducks. Losing an object hurts, but a living thing--that really hurts.

I pray that things are going better for you this week. And I pray that your house will sell soon, with as few showings as possible!

Bless you for sharing your heart, rough places and all.

Kellie said...

I am so behind... but "HUGS" dear friend. It is through those times that we must cling to the Lord with all we have left. It is only through Him that we survive. I surely hope things have gotten better since then.