It is the voice of fear. I know her voice so well. It is a word we shame. It locks onto our hearts and flows into spaces only the Comforter can fill. Fear is not often discussed because it reveals weakness.
Your role as a mother goes beyond the tendrils of doubt and past the reaches of a few bad days thrown into the pot. You are the mother that God chose for YOUR children.
Even the best of us have days that the comfort of downy blankets call with the promise that starting over would be better for everyone. The most relaxed mothers still have moments of exasperation. We are imperfect, needy humans. We are human. Only the Perfect Father could survive days of sibling rivalry, ungrateful hearts, and wearisome behavior without hiding beneath the veil of failure.
Some days this mothering business is more about molding the mother's heart than the rearing of children. Your heavenly Father desires to see you bloom and flourish. He desires for you to recognize your need for Him. He is the one who will ultimately fashion your child's heart. You are the gardener, given the soil of their hearts. It is a privilege to labor and toil in the dirt. It is also messy work that requires rest along the way. We are not asked to create perfect children. We are given the tasks of watering their souls with God's truths; protecting them from the weeds of destructive culture; and tending to their needs with a heart of love.
Before you allow the "what if's" of fear to fill your heart,
remember that He has.
He has your child in the palm of His hand.
He has the future.
He has enough grace to cover our mistakes.
He has chosen you, regardless of your weaknesses.
He has the ability to bound the chains of fear and set your heart free.