2. Do not assume that even though you usually dye your eyebrows to match your haircolor, that they will actually match when using "Beige Brown."
3. Do not assume you will not look like Groucho Marx for the next 36 hours after using said color.
4. Do not assume that you can get out of showing your face in public during those 36 hours. Your children may or may not have an awards night that you are expected to attend sans sunglasses and ball cap.
5. Do not assume that just because I dearly love my children and am truly proud of their year's worth of work that I will actually enjoy sitting through 2 hours of watching 150 other children receive certificates. Oh, and 6 middle schoolers do 15 minutes of modern dance. I am a proud mom, but I am also human.
6. Do not assume that part of me didn't want to print up my own certificate, hand it to my child, and then head to Dairy Queen to celebrate. Go ahead, judge me.
7. Do not assume that I am not nervous about end-of-grade testing. This 1st year homeschooling mom feels like the IRS just showed up at her door and I opened it holding stolen cash. Naked.
8. Do not assume that I don't have to adjust my attitude about church music on a regular basis. I'm not strongly opinionated about much, but when it comes to praising my Lord, I have a hard time with sour-faced choir members "leading" worship.
9. Do not assume that I'm going to say much more about that. Today.
10. Do not assume that I've cooked dinner for my family this week. Let's just say I'm very thankful for my mom, my husband, sandwiches, Kraft in the blue box, and cereal. I could eat cereal for dinner every night if not for the guilt factor.
Do you have a "Do Not Assume" list?