March 12, 2010

Marriage: The Bedroom



I held my breath when I published my last post. You never know how people are going to respond when you throw a topic like SEX into the mix. You came through and were amazingly gracious in your comments. Assuming you don't have free reign of the entire house (due to children, etc...) let's talk about the place in your home where the previous topic takes place.
Your inner sanctum, private retreat, place of escape: the Master Bedroom

Have you ever thought about the captain's quarters of a ship? In days of old, it was the best spot on the ship. Why? It was a place for him to step away from the crew, refresh, rest, and renew. He needed a place to get away so that he could be a great leader. It was also a perk of the job.
Do you have a place like that?

Many of us fall into the trap of using our master bedroom as a dumping ground. Laundry is usually the main culprit. Chaos leads to more chaos and before we know it, the master suite is the master pit.

Most of us would not allow the public rooms of our home to be the collect-all. Why would we allow the room that celebrates the very core of the family to become a heap?

Do the words haven, sanctuary, or retreat describe the condition of your master bedroom?
They should. Your marriage should be the number one priority of your home. The marriage room should reflect it.

Here is the challenge for the weekend:
Take time to clean out your bedroom.
Even if you have to pile it all in the family room, do it.
I bet the heap won't last long when your family has no where to sit to watch tv!
Get ALL of the clutter out. Your bedroom should say, "honey, you are the most important thing in this room, and our marriage deserves the choicest room of the house."

You may want to take it a step further. We did. After we de-cluttered, we decided to paint and get new bedding. I wanted our room to feel like a retreat. It has been well worth the investment. (I'll post before and after photos next week).
The clutter is gone, and every time I step into our room I give a contented sigh.

Yes, haven, retreat, and sanctuary are good words.

12 comments:

Mich said...

I so needed this... I needed the encouragement to do something. you are so right, our bedroom has turned into the dumping ground, because you can close the door when company comes a calling.

Thanks for being brave enough to share what you have learned on your own marriage journey. Even women like me, who have been married for years need the reminders of what is really important.

Thanks again for being a prayer warrior and friend for my sister.

Sarah said...

I love both these posts. I'd also add that it goes both ways. We as women really need sex too...even if we don't think we do or not in the mood. I'd also add not to give up on your husband if it's something that has gotten stale or "boring" to you. If you work at it, you can make it awesome!! But it takes lots of work and communication.
And I'm so cleaning my bedroom this weekend now!!

Sarah said...

I love both these posts. I'd also add that it goes both ways. We as women really need sex too...even if we don't think we do or not in the mood. I'd also add not to give up on your husband if it's something that has gotten stale or "boring" to you. If you work at it, you can make it awesome!! But it takes lots of work and communication.
And I'm so cleaning my bedroom this weekend now!!

Jodee Leader said...

I make our bed every single day just so I can pile laundry on it! Too funny!

I missed the last post so I am going back to read it quick!

Hope you have a great weekend!

Amy Kinser said...

Thanks for the wisdom and heart you have put into your last posts. That's what friends are for. Thanks for being a friend.

Cathy said...

ANOTHER good one!

I SO needed to be reminded of this. I recently posted about "The Corner" of the master bedroom. I KNOW beyond a shadow of a doubt that my husband would appreciate me cleaning it up and making it a "retreat". Thanks for the encouragement!

Amber said...

Egad. My toes hurt. Your high heels are stepping all over them.

Kidding. But I am oh.so. guilty of just making our bedroom the dumping ground. And even after 10 years of living in this house, it is the ONLY room that we haven't fixed. UGH.

Thanks for the reminder, friend.

I now have a project.

Bugs and Sunshine said...

We painted our Master Bedroom Wedgewood Gray (Benjamin Moore) which is the most gorgeous blue/gray color, and we got a white matalasse coverlet for our bed.

Only pictures of us are in the Master Bedroom. White candles, Simplicity.

I have even started putting my alarm clock on the floor under the bed to hide it in the daylight hours so there are no visible electronics. We took the phone out.

It truly is a sanctuary. Great post and thoughts today, as always :).

Tammy said...

Interesting! I have been working in our master bedroom all day trying to clean it out. Feeling very convicted of this concept, and backed up by your post! Back to work!

Kelli said...

Great posts and wonderful reminders. I plan to de-clutter by the end of the week! =) Someone also mentioned to me about taking pictures of our kids out of our bedroom. Do you have any thoughts on this? =)

Samantha said...

That picture makes me want to clear out my room, go on one big shopping spree, and buy a couple gallons of that green paint! YUM.

Gretchen said...

Great thoughts from you and your readers, GOTE. I spent 2 hours decluttering my nightstand (don't ask) this past weekend, and while it wasn't fun, it was so worth it. I'm thinking of changing up our bedding, too. We painted last year, but haven't done much in the way of decorations.